Job Hunting Is Just Like Dating — And Recruiters Are the Worst Ghosters
Let me tell you something. Looking for a job in 2026 has become eerily similar to dating — and not in a good way. We’ve got the butterflies, the chemistry, the promising first conversation… and then the dreaded silence. Sound familiar?
Here’s my story.
A recruiter reached out to me on LinkedIn recently. He thought I’d be a great fit for a role, and honestly? After reading the description, I agreed. I sent over my resume, expressed my interest, and we scheduled a call for the following week. Easy enough. So far so good.
The call itself was great. His energy — and that of his colleague who joined — was warm, engaging, and genuinely exciting. We clicked. There was a real connection there. He told me I was perfect for the role. He even took the time to give me advice for the next round of interviews. He mentioned they were looking to fill the position yesterday — meaning urgency was very much on the table. I left that call feeling confident. Hopeful. Like something real might actually come of this.
And then I waited.
A day passed. Then a few more. I had sent both him and his colleague a thank you email the morning after our call — because that’s what you do, right? You show up. You follow through. You’re professional. Still, nothing came back.
After a full week of silence, I decided to send a follow up email. Nothing. Crickets. Complete radio silence.
And here I am now, doing what every person who’s been left on read has done — making excuses for the other person. Maybe my emails went to spam. Maybe I should reach out on LinkedIn instead. Maybe something came up.
Sound familiar? Because I’ve had this exact internal monologue before — just in a very different context.
This is dating. This is exactly what dating feels like. The promising first encounter. The undeniable energy. The signals that scream this is going somewhere. And then — nothing. You’re left wondering what happened, second-guessing yourself, and debating whether to reach out one more time or just let it go.
But here’s what’s different about the job search version of this story: we are not talking about a casual situationship. We are talking about people’s livelihoods. Their bills. Their sense of purpose. Their ability to put food on the table. Candidates are not dating prospects you can casually ghost when something shinier comes along. We are human beings who took time out of our lives, showed up prepared, gave you our energy — and deserve the basic courtesy of a response.
Have recruiters forgotten that there is an actual person on the other end of that LinkedIn message? A person who got excited. Who maybe told someone close to them I think this one might be it. Who rearranged their schedule, did their research, and brought their best self to that call?
The way candidates are being treated right now is not okay. And it needs to be said out loud.
To the recruiters reading this — I know you’re busy. I know you’re juggling dozens of candidates and a hiring manager who keeps changing the requirements. I get it. But a two-line email that says “we’ve decided to move in a different direction” takes less than sixty seconds to write. That sixty seconds means everything to the person on the receiving end.
We deserve that. At minimum.
And to everyone out there in the job search trenches right now — you are not alone. The ghosting is real. The frustration is valid. And just like in dating, their silence says a lot more about them than it does about you.
Keep going. Your people — and your next opportunity — are out there.
With love always,
The Not So Common Gal 💜